I’ve heard someone close to me say, “We aren’t going to reward this child with toys or food.” To which I say, “Good for you! I wish you well, especially if you plan on having more than one child.”
“Oh, my child will fit into my schedule.” My dear, that sounds wonderful. But babies aren’t born understanding our ways and wishes. Be prepared to be flexible. Some babies are colicky and fuss a lot. Others have bad reflux and hurt when they eat even a little bit. They aren’t born understanding day and night. When you walked during the day, that rocked them to sleep. When you were still at night, that’s when they were awake. That pattern won’t be different outside your tummy. They will still be awake during the night quite a bit in the beginning.
Babies are born with their own personality. They are all different. Unfortunately, they don’t come with their own instruction manual. You have the lovely job of deciphering their code. It’s a labor of love. But you will love them all the more as you grow to understand their complexity and individuality.
“I want my child to be educated.” We all want our children to be the best and the smartest. But it’s also important to let children be children. Let your baby grow in baby steps. Enjoy cradling and cooing to her. Wiggle her little nose and count the piggies on her toes. Enjoy babyhood and don’t rush it.
“We aren’t going to spank or use timeouts. Our tone will be all the discipline and correction he needs.” There will be times when you will wonder who the person was who made that comment. Your child will likely test you in ways you never imagined. Children aren’t born perfect. They are precious little ones who will develop into self-centered toddlers. Get ready to have to use something stronger than your voice to correct them. Not all will listen to your tone and obey.
“Oh, my child isn’t going to ..” Stop and don’t finish that sentence. I promise it will come back to haunt you! All of us can assure you of that one. Your intentions are good, but as mentioned above. All of us are individuals. Your baby is too. Even inside your tummy, his or her temperament and demeanor have already been clearly created and defined. It begins at the beginning.
Enjoy motherhood. Be open to the counsel and experience of other moms. Take their advice to heart. You don’t have to follow it, but don’t discard it as rubbish. You may find a buried treasure in the words of experienced and tested mothers! Love your baby, cuddle and play with him. Hold him as much as you can. He won’t stay little very long. Your house will always be there, but your baby will grow. Treasure these brief moments while you have them.